| By :
George Hutton
Getting into an argument is never fun. What can make it incredibly worse is when you are absolutely certain that you are correct in your opinion, only to later find out you were off base. Apologizing in this circumstance can be exceptionally difficult, especially if you said some things that you wish you hadn't. Here's a good trick to avoid falling into that trap. It starts from an understand of the difference between an associated viewpoint and a dissociated viewpoint. Ninety nine percent of the time, when we are awake, and conscious, we are in an associated frame. Meaning that we see things from our own eyes, and feel things from our own experience. For most of us, the only time we ever see things from a dissociated point of view is in our memories. When we think back to memories, usually memories that happened long ago, we sometimes see them as if we were a third party watching events take place, including watching ourselves. Often times during dreams we see things from an independent, third party perspective. Most people aren't even aware of the difference, but it can be an incredibly useful skill to switch back and forth, in real time. The way to do this is first do it while you are along. This may sound similar to some secret Russian remote viewing training, but it works just the same. As you are sitting there in your chair, instead of seeing the things in front of you, imagine that you are off to the side, watching yourself sitting in the chair. Describe out loud what you see. Try on different perspectives from various places in the room and see how that feels. When you're ready, try this out in public. Sit in a coffee shop and imagine seeing yourself, from a dissociated, third person view, from many different perspectives. Next step is to imagine that you are other people, watching you. Use your instincts to help you imagine seeing you as they see you. After you've easily mastered that, it's time for the next level. Watch and listen to yourself from various viewpoints while you are in a conversation with somebody. Now you can flip between three different perspectives. From your own viewpoint, from your conversation partner's viewpoint, and from an objective, third person viewpoint. Once you get pretty good at this, you'll find it's much easier to see things from the perspectives of others, and this will drastically improve your ability to persuade and influence others, as well as avoiding those nasty arguments.
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